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The funny thing about Miller's dating tips is how easily they translate into tried and true rules of comedy performance.

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is based, not so loosely, on her own dating experiences, and if you’ve seen her do standup you probably have an intimate idea of what goes down in her bedroom. "I'm great at dating because I am very fun to start a relationship with. And I'm down to travel together and, like, go to another country. So when we had the chance to sit down with Schumer, we couldn’t help but ask the hilarious comedienne for her tongue-in-cheek advice on navigating the world of dating. And I have sex usually very quickly in a relationship, so that's how I'm good and fun to date. When you know it's not going to work, it's ok to get out of there. "Too close to your mom, narcissist, picky eater, someone who doesn't like to go down on me [are deal breakers for me]." 7.Well, we actually track their performance while sending openers, handling the back-and-forth messages and even setting up dates for our clients! )There are 100s of online dating sites and apps out there, but what reels in the ladies on Tinder can torpedo your chances on Bumble.

So we’re not only giving you incredible profile examples you can use, we’re also telling you which dating site or app they work best on.

"I haven't had a relationship since I was 25, so it's ridiculous," she explains.

"I'm just making fun — looking at life and making a joke." Having spent decades observing others in relationships, she's seen the good, the bad, the ugly, and the "Oh my god, I have to put this in an act." After all, those who can't won't do, teach.

Write the wrong thing, and you’re doomed to fail, with your empty inbox serving as a constant reminder that your profile’s problematic.

On the other hand, when you write a compelling profile, you can watch messages from high-quality women pile up in your inbox, and fill your dating calendar like clockwork. How do we know our profiles really attract beautiful women?

Here’s an example that really works:“I am a rocket scientist. And after mastering Italian, I became an international super spy. But I do like a good martini and I got a B in my 5th grade science class. Bumble mainly attracts women in the 25-35 age range who are intelligent and successful.